Love between two introverts?

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Dear IntrovertZone,

I was wondering if an introvert and an introvert could have a good loving relationship? Or will a relationship for an introvert only work with an extrovert? My therapist tells me introvert/introvert relationships will never work. It’s a stuck relationship. But my gut feels strongly against it. Any advice?

Photo credit: katerha

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{ 71 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Asavari

I’m an introvert married to an introvert and I wouldn’t have it any other way. We really bolster each other through exhausting interactions with extraverts and we completely understand what recharging, space and being left the hell alone really mean. We also push each other to fulfill our external obligations, but with understanding and compassion. Extraverts never get it and are always trying to change you, or they just feel hurt and make you feel guilty about not gabbing all day long.

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2 Molahanor

That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts.

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3 Ernest from Chicago and Suburb

I guess love between two people even they have some problems with their personality will still work if we just know how to deal with the problems.

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4 Worli from Internet Marketing

Have a good loving relationship will depend on many factors. Being introvert or extrovert is just one factor. Its like two great people cannot always be a great couple. They may be great on individual stand but not as couple.
Worli@ Internet Marketing´s last post ..Niche Marketing

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5 Mary Eve from Do What You Love Journey

I believe it works because 2 introverts resemble each other. We are 2 introverts me and my husband, and we just need some time to do our little stuff at times, but it’s a success since we’ve been together for almost 8 years!
Mary Eve @ Do What You Love Journey´s last post ..Top 60 Do What You Love Quotes

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6 Chad from How To Mack

Of course two introverts can have a great relationship! I’m an introvert and I strictly date other introverts. to tell you the truth extroverts don’t appeal to me at all.
Chad@How To Mack´s last post ..Body Language To Attract Women

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7 Asavari

@Chad: Totally agree! I actually feel quite repulsed by extroverts (as I’m sure many of them must feel about our ilk). The few relationships I’ve had with them — for shallow reasons — have never ended well. It’s always go-go-go, incessant chatter, big toothy grins ugh

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8 yogisusan

Ugh

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9 Bettina143

I think they will both jive with each other since they have similar traits and they both understand each other… Anyway, its the love that counts for their marriage to work out.
Bettina143´s last post ..Chamonix

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10 yogisusan

I think that an introvert/introvert couple would be the best possible scenario! Both parties need their space, so it doesn’t fall into the pattern of one person needing space and the other wanting to crowd the first. I am guessing your therapist is an extrovert.

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11 Heeb

Im an introverted female and have always been attracted to introverted men because I can appreciate their introvert inclinations, especially their need (and mine) for space to recharge before resuming meaningful banter! I think an introvert and introvert relationship is the ideal match made in introvert heaven! an extrovert can be fun company and can keep a conversation flowing but i only appreciate this in small doses.

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12 Akishya

I think both introvert can also have a loving relationships. They both understand their feelings, attitude, character and behavior. And is they really both in love2 with each other, I know it would work. Who knows this will help for being an introvert.
Akishya´s last post ..Happy New Year To All Of You And Hope You Like The Aquarium Fish Photos Here …

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13 Enrika

I think two introverts will really not work at all…But on the other hand, who knows?Evrything today is possible…
Enrika´s last post ..second hand cars stroud

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14 yogisusan

I don’t understand how two introverts together is not the best possible scenario. I need my space as an introvert, and extroverts are always crowding my space. It is a constant battle.

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15 Ava

I disagree with your therapist, me and my hubby (both introverts) have been happily married for 12 years now. The only issue is when we visit my extrovert mother-in-law who tries to bring us to everyone she knows parties or get together whenever we visit. Thankfully my in laws live about 5 states away. I had relationships with both introverts and extroverts before meeting my husband, my worst relationships were with extroverts. When breaking up with one extrovert his main complaint was the fact that I never wanted to get to all the events he liked to attend. With my husband we don’t have that problem and completely understand each other. We still here complaints from other family members on both sides for having a tiny destination wedding with just us and our parents. But dealing with so many people (we both have big families) for so many hours like with a traditional wedding with no chance to recharge was just impossible to imagine.

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16 bellejarre

I had a destination wedding too in the hopes of avoiding a circus, but my extrovert in-laws still managed to lure a 130 guests there. I just had my parents, four friends and an aunt.

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17 Ava

Wow 130 guests you have my sympathies. I could not handle so many people at one time with all the attention being on me, especially having to meet and greet all or most of them.

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18 bellejarre

Thank you for the sympathy. I’m still recovering… almost a year later ;-)

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19 Humbugin

I just divorced an extrovert after 20 years of misunderstandings, expectations which led to disappointments….it was always SOO hard to be with him. Tried and tried for years. He never understood my need for alone time, always asking what was wrong, what did he do, how can he fix it….never believed me when I said nothing is wrong. Always talking and talking and talking and being loud and verbose in public (about me too…UGH), wanting extreme PDA, drawing attention to himself and us and I was ALWAYS having to repeat myself over and over…gah!…There were many other issues but I was totally overwhelmed for 20 years and 4 kids later….he’s not a bad guy, we just don’t get along married….drove me nuts…

Now I am in a relationship with an introvert, the peace is surreal. He tells me all the time how he can’t believe how well I get him and I can’t believe how well he gets me. There’s never any pressure with us…anytime we have issues, we work them out calmly without tons of dramatics and blame and move on with everything settled. But the calm and peace…is amazing. And there is no lack of passion, either…
What’s interesting, he said in the beginning I would grow bored of him, as all the others before me had….I don’t find him boring in the least…LOL

I’m sure introverts and extroverts can survive and have thriving relationships that far exceed my own, but it was a huge huge contention in my experience.

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20 Monica Weber

I think being an introvert to introvert relationship is not bad at all. It is like both of you having the same interests. I think I like it better because you’ll be living in a quite lifestyle than shouting at each other everytime.

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