Comments on: Introvert: Hold a moment while I’m processing…

By: cb

cb — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 01:20:40 +0000

Yes, they may not stop to consider at all that there are other VALID, NORMAL styles.

By: Jewels

Jewels — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 12:56:57 +0000

Thanks, I think the hardest part has been for the ones I work closely with, to understand my needs. But I think it is often difficult for extroverts to accept other communication styles since the majority of America are extroverts.

By: cb

cb — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 22:48:25 +0000

Jewels – that is perfect. For three weeks I’ve been intending to write a post about that very subject, how I made a huge mistake more than once by treating people as I wanted to be treated, when really I needed to treat them according to THEIR personality. Yep, I’ve had bosses who deleted all of their emails – couldn’t be bothered with all those details!

By: Jewels

Jewels — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 20:08:57 +0000

I am starting to use the introvert/extrovert philosophy at work. I often have to meet with people to obtain information, so I analyze their communications first.

Short & sweet… extrovert, let me know what you want and get out — will prefer to talk
Includes lots of personal stuff… extrovert, will prefer to talk and will glaze over if a detailed email is sent
Detailed email…introvert, appreciates detail, will NOT be happy with an “off the cuff” phone call, send info via email

So far this is working terrific, my boss….the “lots of personal stuff” type can’t understand that SOME people really do prefer to converse via email and don’t like to be hit with a bunch of questions at a meeting. Imagine that…

Jewels

By: cb

cb — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 23:44:36 +0000

It sure does! Today I tried to push for sending a survey out to people we need information from instead of having a big meeting with all of them there. I pointed out that after the first 20 minutes, everything else that gets said will just be rehashing those first 20 minutes over and over again with needless blather. Two intelligent introverts near me said, “I KNOW!”

By: Jewels

Jewels — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 11:55:35 +0000

My workplace is one of those places you must have a meeting for everything. Everyone talking on the heels of the next. By the time I formulate what I want to say they are 3 subjects past it & it is no longer relevant. My extroverted co worker says I have to jump in & laughs when I say I really can’t. No concept. So after awhile all this constant stimulation puts me to sleep. J

By: Emily Roberts

Emily Roberts — Fri, 04 Jun 2010 02:23:28 +0000

Me neither; I virtually never use interjections like that unless I’m put on the spot and required to give an answer immediately. It’s curious though; my extremely extroverted friend uses “like” and “um” literally after every other word. I can tell that he’s saying everything that comes to mind the instant it’s there, and sometimes his mouth works faster than his brain, so he runs out of things to say before coming up with something new, and ends up throwing “like” and “um” around as filler so his brain can catch up to his mouth

By: Emily Roberts

Emily Roberts — Fri, 04 Jun 2010 02:01:26 +0000

I have trouble with the whole thinking before I speak thing; whenever someone asks me something, I feel like I have to answer right away, and that often leaves me floundering for words halfway through… I do a lot of pantomiming Even if I had the opportunity to stop and think about what I wanted to say, I can never think straight when I know someone is watching me, waiting for me to say something. It’s so unnerving that I can’t think straight and just say whatever happens to be on the tip of my tongue at the time, and sometimes it’s not all that intelligent I definitely prefer writing emails to talking face to face.

By: cb

cb — Thu, 06 May 2010 02:16:17 +0000

Some good tips, and yes – I definitely remember plenty about conversations that already took place, yet I may have trouble coming up with a way to verbalize my thoughts, especially to people who aren’t in my “inner circle.”

By: EB

EB — Wed, 05 May 2010 02:47:40 +0000

This rings very true for me, too. I often handle the “pause for thinking” delay with humor. My standard joke is: “I have an idea about that; let me gather my thoughts–picture a loading bar.”

I’ve also found it helps when listening to others to mentally “tag” words or phrases to go with my ideas as I’m forming them. For example, if a friend is telling me about sleeping problems with her toddler, and it occurs to me to suggest a certain book, I’ll tag the title and author, so that the center of the sentence is in place already as soon as it’s my turn to talk.

Sometimes I’ll even tap my fingers on a table or my knee to keep track, that way, when the person talking pauses, I can say, “Well, there’s three things to consider.” I’ve found giving people a number helps me keep from getting derailed before my idea is fully explained.

I, too do the thinking out loud thing, and I often practice a conversation in advance, e.g., I’ll be driving, washing dishes, etc., and I’ll think of something I want to say to a certain person, then I’ll begin framing the best presentation for the idea out loud as I think it out.

That trait of my own, along with some of those mentioned here makes me wonder if introverts memories of prior conversations–things that have been said out loud–are more easily accessed than sentences that have yet to be formed. I, for example, can often remember in great detail conversations with others. does that hold true for anyone else?