I’d get a lot more haircuts if I could order ’em from Amazon!


I know I look a whole lot better with a haircut that’s just four to six weeks old. But from early October until December 31st, I did not get a cut and really didn’t look my best at work or during the holidays. I consciously trimmed down my obligations for December, because with the mountain of house cleaning, shopping, decorating, cooking, crowds, entertaining, and just general stress I knew I’d have, I didn’t want to add one unnecessary item that would make the holidays even tougher on my introvert nature.

Actually, although December was an extraordinary example of overload for the introvert, I tend to put off haircuts an extra week or two all through the year just because I don’t want to be bothered with it all. If it were possible to order a little box from Amazon and have my hair suddenly be the way I want it, I’d probably be doing it every three weeks!

When I go into a hair salon, I’m immediately assaulted with sharp smells and noise, although that’s not the main problem. But then there’s the personal crowding and talking in the waiting area that affects me almost physically. The other people waiting are talking loudly on their cell phones or even to each other, sitting just inches away from me on each side. No one can just sit quietly and read something while they wait. I find I am reading the same page over and over again because I can’t even think well enough to read a fiction book. Then of course the hairdresser may come out and acknowledge me, explaining happily that he is running behind and would I like a drink? No thanks.. (I just want my hair cut).. Then finally it’s my turn and the ceremony begins. First the shampoo which goes on and on and on, for maximum tippage, then I am turned over to the hairdresser. I participate in the small talk until he gets started talking so much to me and the stylists around him that I can’t get a word in edgewise, “Um..the left side is..” Sometimes he gets so carried away with what he’s talking and laughing about that he stops entirely, scissors in the air, so that he can be free to gesture while he talks. My stomach may be in knots, silently screaming, “You can cut and talk at the same time can’t you?” Still, I’m so happy to see the results when it’s finished that I vow I’ll come back once a month. It’s worth it isn’t it?

Lately I’ve started to realize that this same issue is the reason I haven’t had people in to do updates and improvements in my 55 year old house. In fact, when there’s a repair that must be done, I feel the stress as if doom is hanging over me – until it is finished. I always wonder wildly if I could manage to fix it myself, but I know I couldn’t. Analyzing my unhappy feelings, I’ve found that the main issue is not the money. The main issue is having to call each person to do work and arrange to leave the office to meet them at my house. If they show up. Listen to them, communicate with them, get the repair done, and hope it’s good. After they leave, the last thing I’d ever think about is how I’ll call someone else to rip out something that’s working perfectly well.

A couple of weeks ago I found out that the pipe that drains my kitchen and the laundry room in the basement had deteriorated and needed to be replaced. It was in the basement, of course, under the concrete slab. Through several different visits, plumbers jack hammered a path across my laundry room for a new pipe, cut a hole in the wall, joined the new pipe to an existing one in the basement bathroom, then poured fresh concrete in the trench they’d made in the floor. It wasn’t until today, when everything was finished, that I felt like myself again. hole in laundry room wall

Does my feeling normal and good depend so entirely on having “no loose ends” or at least no big disruptions in my home? Could be. I really love normal life! Stay tuned, because now I have to find someone to fix this wall! Or maybe I could just drag a heavy dresser in front of it…?



  1. I have a hair salon that I LOVE. No cell phones are allowed, and it is a “day spa” so it’s nice and quiet and peaceful. My stylist is also an introvert and she barely talks to me unless she needs to ask a question. The shampoo girls are awesome and give a full head massage (they’ve obviously been trained it it, it’s not just rubbing your head, it really feels like a massage). They have a Keurig so I can get my own coffee. There’s no loud talking or gossiping like in some salons. I always feel rejuvenated after I go there and I look forward to my appointments. Keep looking and I bet you can find a salon you like! 🙂
    .-= Cameron´s last blog ..Favorite {Photo} Friday–The Dance in The Dalles =-.

    • Wow, I guess I’ll have to search a little bit more! There are already special salons for guys to watch sports during a cut, even in my small city, so maybe there’s a quiet one for people who want to relax.

  2. I haven’t had my hair cut in about 3.5 years! I have it long, and obviously with no maintenance needed. Well, sort of not needed. It doesn’t look its best, but I never “remember” to see about a trim. But my upstairs neighbor, I recently learned by chance, has her hair dresser come to her place to do the cut! This particular hair dresser is a “house call” hairdresser, I guess you could say. I will likely join them the next time she gets hers cut, so I can finally get a trim. Maybe you could find someone like that in your area! Of course there is still the issue of calling someone and having them in your home…

    Speaking of which, is that stressful for others as well? The (invited) invasion of the home?

    I had to get my dishwasher repaired recently, and the guy was a talker. And offensive. And it took them until their third visit to actually show up. That was why I lived with my old, broken, dishwasher for a year before getting it replaced to begin with. Just my luck that the “new” one had issues within 6 months of installation!

    I also need a new garbage disposal…and probably could stand to have a few others things done around the place. But yes, the whole thing is an ordeal.

    I even find grocery shopping to be something I dread, to a degree. The little local shop I go to is wonderful, the people are so helpful and friendly, and they even walk your bags to the car! And all of that is why I sometimes feel like I have to force myself to go. I don’t want my bags walked to the car or to have the cashiers and other workers recognize me or have the super nice and helpful workers ask if they can help me. Sometimes I feel like such a curmudgeon!

    • Deb I’m totally with you – on the repair guys PLUS the grocery store! I’ve also been going to a small store near me because it’s quick and the prices are lower than the nearest big one. But the wrestle for the groceries at the end – so I can push the cart to my own car instead of walking with someone else pushing them – is ridiculous. When I’m older and retired, perhaps I’ll need all that interaction, but right now I just want to swipe my card, say, “Thank you!” and LEAVE.

  3. My hair dresser has been my aunt since I was born. She’s not much of a talker more of a doer so that works for me. Plus I don’t have to pay for my haircuts or coloring : )…thats whats family is for. I’m sorry about your house…thats sucks what they did.

  4. I have gone back to doing my own hair again. It is trimmed all around, except the crown of my head. There I am saving a tuft of hair, also known as a sikha.

    I really find it annoying when hairdresser go on and on, especially as I have worked as a hairdresser myself. One thing they were very persistent to teach us at school was to listen to the customer, and that the customer is there to be pampered. Some customers actually come to the hairdresser to relax; just get their hair cut in silence.
    .-= xen´s last blog ..Let the lip rip the tube. =-.

    • How awesome if we could choose to get our hair cut in silence. I might even get my nails done if I could be watching tv or daydreaming instead of carrying on small talk with a stranger!

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  6. I’m a guy in late 20’s and I have two hairdressers, both female:

    1) Not possible to book a time, just come and sit and wait. She’s in her 60’s or something (only cuts men hair), she’s nice and she talks and talks and talks aaaand talks some more, but I don’t mind cause she ask lots of relevant questions too and mostly cut and talk at the same time.

    2) Must book a time but it never holds up, always end up waiting 15-30 minutes. She’s in her late 20’s I think, early 30’s maybe. I noticed how she talks a lot with her female customers, I guess it’s girl talk. I can’t understand it since it’s in their native language. With me, she just asks how I cant it done and then doesn’t say a word until it’s finished. I like that too cause it’s just in & out. Also I don’t like to talk too much when strangers are sitting nearby listening to what we say and there’s another customer next to me also getting hair done by another hairdresser.

    Well, look at me, going on and on about my own hairdressers here – am I turning extrovert? (just kidding).

    I hope you can get the wall fixed. Otherwise, buy a huge TV and set up a coach – would make a great room to watch the game!
    .-= Klaus @ TechPatio´s last blog ..Twitter Mashup: 100 Megapixel Profile Picture =-.

    • LOL – you have some good hairdressers there! Yep, I could get a huge TV to put there – then if I ever need to sell the house, I could just leave it in place and tell prospective buyers the TV comes with the house!

  7. I can totally relate to the hair cut thing, in fact I’ve been putting one off for a couple of weeks now. I’ll have to get one this weekend, getting a bit shaggy. Luckily it doesn’t take much time to cut mine.

    I like the Amazon haircut in a box thing, I would definitely buy that. Although you can buy the flowbee (the cutter you hook to a vacuum) not exactly a haircut in a box but at least you can do it at home. I know someone that can’t live without theirs….I don’t know how well that would work for women though.

    A simple fix for that hole…You could put a bad ass Jimi Hendrix poster over it.
    .-= Nick Laborde´s last blog ..Thriving… One Screw Up At A Time =-.

  8. I can soooo relate to this. My hair stylist is very young – maybe 20 – and is definitely perky and talkative. Sweet girl and love how she cuts and colors my hair, but sometimes I’ll leave there exhausted and with a headache from all the chit chat! As far as home repairs, I needed to use a power drill yesterday for a small project. I have never used one b/4 in my life (I’m a recent widow). First I discovered the drill bit I needed was missing. Rather than just call a neighbor, I got online to find out if it was possible to purchase just a single bit then drove to Home Depot to buy one. Then I had trouble figuring out how to insert the bit so got online again to search for how-to videos. Finally figured it all out and successfully finished my project, but probably took me couple of hours vs. 30 min if I would have asked for help. I did feel really proud of myself though!

    • Michelle – I’ve done that too – years ago after hours of a very slow highlight and a meticulous cut, a stylist asked me, “What’s wrong?” and I almost wailed, “I’m exhausted!” (from all that talking)!!!

      My gosh you sound like me – I would much rather go buy stuff or do any amount of internet searching than to go ask a neighbor. I am VERY proud of you! Heck, anything involving a drill I’d already decided I just can’t have – like window coverings for windows that don’t already have ’em. Good job!

  9. I guess most of us experienced the same thing whenever we go to hair salons and at times a little chitchat from the hairdresser builds rapport and makes up for a good service. Too much of it though can be annoying especially if the hairdresser encourages more services than you actually need (ex. hot oil, hair color, perming, etc.). Good thing I have a friend who works part time in a salon and I usually call her for appointments and have my haircut done in the comfort of my own house.

  10. Wow, you have really hit the nail on the head! Once again, I didn’t realize these “issues” were common among introverts. I also has to call a plumber to repair pipes in our home. I was a wreck. I tried to distract myself, but I didn’t feel relief until he was gone, and all was well. Luckily, I am comfortable with this particular plumber now. Anytime we have an issue, we call him specifically. I find that if I know who is coming, I’m less anxious. He’s been out one time since, and it was much less traumatic. And about the haircuts… I trim my own for months to put off a trip to the salon. Then, at the last minute, I will typically call my mom to cut my hair! At least she knows I’m an introvert, and I need a little personal space. I think the root of it is that we thrive on routine- anytime it’s disrupted (even for a haircut) we cringe. I need my routine to stay in tact at all times or I begin to lose my ability to deal with people, especially those less than understanding extraverts.
    .-= AL´s last blog ..Let it be. =-.

    • Oh yes – the routine! That is a lot of my issue. Even though I now have a stylist I’m very comfortable with and he just loves me for some reason – and even though I have a plumber who’s almost like a member of the family (since this is an old house) – I just want Normal Life. I don’t like to know I’m going to a community- or school- or user- group-meeting after work, and I feel a little uncomfortable even when anticipating a happy visit out of town to my family. I really thrive on my comfy, happy routine.

  11. Wow, that sounds like an ordeal! The only times when I’m anxious at the hair salon is when the hairdresser is using those tiny and super sharp scissors near my eyes or my ears.

    If I were you, I’d try checking out other (and less busy) salons. Trust me, not all salons are like that, and hairdressers have all different personalities so you might find one who has a more calming effect on you.
    .-= lazygirl´s last blog ..Long time no sew =-.

  12. I haven’t been to a hair salon in a while. The last time I went was a few months ago, and I haven’t been back since because the prices are exorbitant and that is money that could be spent elsewhere. So I try to do my hair at home as much as possible, and I recently found out about a line of hair care products that I am hoping to try at some time soon. But when I do go to the salon, I feel the same way that cb and some of the other posters have described. The environment is just one big assault on my senses. Plus, the wait time before being seated with a hairdresser is often times ridiculous. It makes me feel like leaving before even getting my hair done. The most recent salon that I have tried has been better because the times that I have visited, it wasn’t busy, and I got seated with a hairdresser, right away. Plus, the hair dressers who work there, are hispanic, and most of them barely speak english. I can’t speak or understand much spanish, so even if I wanted to participate in conversation, I couldn’t, unless I wanted to make a fool of myself trying to remmeber spanish words that I learned in high school.
    There is one thing that I have to add though. I think that some of the behavior that is displayed in hair salons, by the hair dressers, speaks of a lack of professional etiquette. I think that a bit of conversation and having a laugh makes for a positive work environment. But when it gets to the point where those behaviors are interrupting the actual service that needs to be provided, then that is most definitely a problem, because the actual service that is being provided, takes longer to complete, and that’s what creates a longer wait time for other customers who are waiting to get their hair done.

    • I like the thought of having the hairdresser barely speak English! Unless of course I was trying to tell him/her something about how I want it cut. I often don’t have very good luck with trying to convey that sort of thing anyway though…

  13. I like it when I get a pedicure and the language barrier keeps the chatter down a bit. Is that awful? I don’t mind some pleasantries, but I don’t want to talk the whole time, I want to zone out and enjoy it.

    As for hair salons…exact thing here, cb. I last got my hair cut in October. I have got to go back in the next few weeks, it’s way overdue and I am looking for a job…should I get an interview, I can’t be looking like this! I go to an Aveda salon, it’s really not a horrible sensory overload experience, and it smells nice, not like chemicals. But still, I have to force myself to go. For years I had the best of both worlds: an Aveda salon that was one hairdresser in her tiny cute shop. She had one customer in at a time. Heaven!

  14. I am so glad that I found this website! I stumbled upon by typing in “introvert hairstylist” in the search box. I was actually thinking about changing careers, because sometimes I feel like the only hairstylist in the world that is an introvert. I hate making small talk with clients, but I love cutting/coloring hair. It seems as if the other women I work with have a larger clientele because the can talk constantly. I was starting to wonder if it was a job requierement. Glad to know some people may actually enjoy me not talking their ears off!

    • Hi Mandy, yep, I’m sure a good percentage of people enjoy the nice chance to just get their hair professionally cut or colored without having to do all that false small talk. I wish more people understood that either introvert or extrovert is totally normal and fine, so that way we could actually talk about it – and express a preference for an introverted hair stylist if we want one!

  15. I know this comment comes a long time after the previous ones, but I just discovered this blog and am over the moon that all you introverts are out there!! One time I had an appointment with a new hair stylist (new to me). This woman talked the entire time! Not only that, she handed me a photo album of her vacation pictures, and proceeded to tell me the content of every text message she had from her ex-husband. Then she went on and on about how her wonderful kids, and these kids kept calling on her cell phone the whole time she worked on my hair. It was one of the worst hair salon experiences I’ve ever had. I just honestly don’t understand people like this. Do they really believe their lives are this interesting to total strangers? As for the haircut in a box – sign me up!!

    • Hi Nanette! It’s always a good time to comment on these posts, because I think we introverts will have the same situations in life until the end of time. 🙂 That appointment you had sounds like the appointment from hell yet very familiar – because most of the appointments I’ve had (several different places over the years) have been a lot like that! I’m with you: I’d never assume that I should just start yapping about my kids and their activities as if someone else would be listening with rapt attention. But maybe the best defense is a good offense! 😉

      Glad to have you here!

  16. I can 100% relate to this point about the haircuts and everything. My hair is the longest its been in forever right now. I just don’t want to deal the hair cutting place. With a wedding and my own wedding coming up, I see that I’ll have to get out and do it. *sigh

    I’m an introvert to the max but trying to change that.
    Scott Webb@Wedding Photographer London Ontario´s last post ..This Photographers Website got a Makeover

    • Scott it sounds like you have a lot of social activity coming up! I hope you enjoy it all. Maybe the haircut will be a first step, warming you up for the first wedding. 🙂

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