From the category archives:

Family and Social Life

We can’t always treat others as WE’d want to be treated

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I’ve always enjoyed people I thought of as “considerate.” In fact, before I knew I was an introvert, I mentally divided my friends and acquaintances into “considerate” vs. “sort of pushy.” If I announced an occasion coming up or had some major life event happen, the “considerate” people were the ones who would ask, “How [...]

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Does budgeting our people-time mean introverts are snobs?

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Whether we think of introversion as a matter of spending energy when we’re interacting with others and recharging alone, or as becoming overwhelmed and overstimulated by human interaction, and resting when alone, we definitely know that being with people comes at a cost. We can’t possibly do every social thing that our extroverted friends are [...]

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Be selective about your activities, but do the important ones anyway

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Sometimes we’re accused of being snobs or disliking society in general. “OK, just be that way! You’re antisocial!” We’ve all heard that when we say no thanks to the fourth lunch invitation that week or to yet another party with coworkers. Of course there’s nothing wrong with us, any more than there’s something wrong with [...]

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Of course I don’t want to go, but an ask would be nice!

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Sometimes it’s easy to feel lonely just because of all the wild activity we see (and imagine) all around us. We hear about parties and other social gatherings to which we weren’t even invited, and of course we see evidence of such events all the time, even at the supermarket. People are busily buying snack [...]

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Introvert micro energy management

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Most of us introverts are conscious of how we have to be careful to allocate our days and people-energy to the people and things that we care about most in our lives. We want to spend time with loved ones and other friends. We need to give our very best to our job, and that [...]

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Holidays and the introvert

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If you’re an introvert who celebrates any of the late year holidays, then sometime around the beginning or middle of October you probably became aware of a nagging thought that it’s getting to be that time again. If you have family members to love, then your thoughts about the holidays are not all bah humbug, [...]

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Four times it would be great if introverts had extra batteries

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As I’ve told you, I truly love being an introvert. I can’t describe to extroverts the elation I feel when I know I have a good long stretch of time where I can read, write, or do whatever I want. But of course I live in the real world where every day is not a [...]

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Introvert does not equal doormat!

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In the past few days, a reader named Bella has left comments on the post about how asking an introvert for an outrageous favor may make us hate someone, or of course a more accurate way of saying it would have been that we’d avoid someone. In Bella’s case, it is her own sister who [...]

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Introverts need time alone, but we can also get lonely

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For the many years I didn’t know what an introvert was, I told people close to me that I guessed I was a “loner.” It was the only way I could describe the fact that although I might chitchat and joke around with others when we were all together, when it came time to run [...]

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Be nice to your introverted family members – they’ll be there when you need them

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I’m not trying to insult extroverts here. The reason I’m writing this post is because it seems that all we do sometimes is to talk about introversion as if it’s a problem to be overcome. “How to…. if you’re an introvert.” “How introverts can manage….” Although we introverts often don’t think about it this way, [...]

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Introverted kids do not need “fixing,” but they may need recharging!

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If your child is an introvert, he most likely lets you know when he needs to be alone. You may catch him working a puzzle or reading a book all alone, and please don’t think or say, “How sad!” when you see that. Introverts need time to be alone the way we need nutrients and [...]

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Should introverts “force” themselves to do things with others?

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“Aw, do I hafta?” You might hear me saying that to myself right before a friend’s wedding or a business dinner. I’m pretty strongly introverted, and although I love my friends and family and want to have great working relationships, I’d happily skip a lot of social events to which I’m invited. My idea of [...]

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