Comments on: Asking an introvert for an outrageous favor may make him hate you http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you Sun, 05 Feb 2012 01:14:09 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 By: hunterX0506 http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you/comment-page-1#comment-6010 hunterX0506 Mon, 07 Nov 2011 13:16:34 +0000 http://introvertzone.com/?p=95#comment-6010 I am very protective of my solitude and reading time and time for sitting on the couch thinking. I am BUSY and if someone else thinks I do not look busy, I correct that impression in a hurry. | :P I am very protective of my solitude and reading time and time for sitting on the couch thinking. I am BUSY and if someone else thinks I do not look busy, I correct that impression in a hurry. | :P
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]]> By: Charm http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you/comment-page-1#comment-5974 Charm Thu, 03 Nov 2011 18:51:18 +0000 http://introvertzone.com/?p=95#comment-5974 I agree for what you've talking about! I’m also introvert and I’m so disappointed when people take my nice attitude as a license to abuse. It happens often though and I got used to it. I agree for what you’ve talking about! I’m also introvert and I’m so disappointed when people take my nice attitude as a license to abuse. It happens often though and I got used to it.
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]]> By: James@burn the fat build the muscle http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you/comment-page-1#comment-5915 James@burn the fat build the muscle Sun, 30 Oct 2011 15:59:34 +0000 http://introvertzone.com/?p=95#comment-5915 Hi there, i think some of people has taking advantages you so they can have spare times and i don't think people who avoiding conflict is introvert. Maybe they just don't want to waste their time or energy enganging conflict with other people. Hi there, i think some of people has taking advantages you so they can have spare times and i don’t think people who avoiding conflict is introvert. Maybe they just don’t want to waste their time or energy enganging conflict with other people.
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]]> By: Janah http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you/comment-page-1#comment-5905 Janah Fri, 28 Oct 2011 16:54:37 +0000 http://introvertzone.com/?p=95#comment-5905 Definitely right! I really think that’s the way a lot of people think of boundaries. I realize that this coworker had her boundaries to protect, and I had no problem with understanding that, but when I approached her about certain problems that I had with her, it was to protect my own boundaries as well, even though I didn’t really think of it that way at that time. Thanks for posting. Definitely right! I really think that’s the way a lot of people think of boundaries. I realize that this coworker had her boundaries to protect, and I had no problem with understanding that, but when I approached her about certain problems that I had with her, it was to protect my own boundaries as well, even though I didn’t really think of it that way at that time. Thanks for posting.
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]]> By: megatron06 http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you/comment-page-1#comment-5629 megatron06 Mon, 17 Oct 2011 14:43:25 +0000 http://introvertzone.com/?p=95#comment-5629 I thought about all the times people have told me “Becky, it’s fine if you don’t want to do it. Just say no. I’ll ask someone else.” I guess I sounded passive-aggressive or something. | :P I thought about all the times people have told me “Becky, it’s fine if you don’t want to do it. Just say no. I’ll ask someone else.” I guess I sounded passive-aggressive or something. | :P
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]]> By: kylamonas http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you/comment-page-1#comment-5600 kylamonas Sun, 16 Oct 2011 13:57:21 +0000 http://introvertzone.com/?p=95#comment-5600 We human have individualism as they say, we are different in some other ways, we never had a pattern with our behavior but with what you site as an introvert, most and almost numerous, introvert really hate it when they are ask favor by any body even if its house mate or a family. But we have to understand why is this so. Let's respect each other preferences., if it suits them to be that way then let us respect it. We human have individualism as they say, we are different in some other ways, we never had a pattern with our behavior but with what you site as an introvert, most and almost numerous, introvert really hate it when they are ask favor by any body even if its house mate or a family. But we have to understand why is this so. Let’s respect each other preferences., if it suits them to be that way then let us respect it.
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]]> By: Gail http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you/comment-page-1#comment-5564 Gail Sat, 15 Oct 2011 00:04:17 +0000 http://introvertzone.com/?p=95#comment-5564 I am very protective of my solitude and reading time and time for sitting on the couch thinking. I am BUSY and if someone else thinks I do not look busy, I correct that impression in a hurry. I have pretty much zero interpersonal skills, too, so it’s not like people seek me out. ;) I am very protective of my solitude and reading time and time for sitting on the couch thinking. I am BUSY and if someone else thinks I do not look busy, I correct that impression in a hurry. I have pretty much zero interpersonal skills, too, so it’s not like people seek me out. ;)
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]]> By: jazz0506 http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you/comment-page-1#comment-5364 jazz0506 Wed, 05 Oct 2011 10:31:37 +0000 http://introvertzone.com/?p=95#comment-5364 I have managed to shrug people off when they’ve asked this of me, but I always feel irritated, and I know that many of them have thought that I am a horrible bitch for not helping them. Frankly, I don’t care. If they knew someone who was a good mechanic, they would go to the mechanic’s shop and then pay him/her for the work, even if the mechanic was a friend. | :P I have managed to shrug people off when they’ve asked this of me, but I always feel irritated, and I know that many of them have thought that I am a horrible bitch for not helping them. Frankly, I don’t care. If they knew someone who was a good mechanic, they would go to the mechanic’s shop and then pay him/her for the work, even if the mechanic was a friend. | :P
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]]> By: Champsey http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you/comment-page-1#comment-5363 Champsey Wed, 05 Oct 2011 09:27:32 +0000 http://introvertzone.com/?p=95#comment-5363 Some people will like you no matter what, others won’t like you, no matter what. Just be you and let the chips fall where they may, find a friend that they love you for what you are.. Some people will like you no matter what, others won’t like you, no matter what. Just be you and let the chips fall where they may, find a friend that they love you for what you are..
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]]> By: Patti http://introvertzone.com/asking-an-introvert-for-an-outrageous-favor-may-make-him-hate-you/comment-page-1#comment-5073 Patti Fri, 23 Sep 2011 18:25:36 +0000 http://introvertzone.com/?p=95#comment-5073 I'm primarily an Introvert in my thinking and behavior, but since I've learned how to be more assertive, I've found I enjoy social activities much more. I'm no longer afraid I'll get my boundaries stomped on or be made to do something I don't want to do. It took a while, but here's what I learned: (1) Feeling at peace with myself is more important than getting people to like or accept me. Doing my "own thing" comes first in my life. (2) Any problem with people always comes back to me. If someone tramples on my boundaries, then I'm the one that allowed it. If I say "yes" when I want to say "no" then that's MY mistake. (3) I'm a social animal even though I like lots of alone time--I'm not going to punish myself with loneliness just because I refuse to learn a few assertive/social skills. (4) It's never WHAT you say that offends people, it's HOW you say it. (5) There's good and loving qualities in most all people...even the rude, insensitive ones. I choose to focus on the behaviors and traits I enjoy and ignore the others. Assertiveness is a lifelong learning experience for me. As soon as I learn how to be "kindly" assertive in one type of situation, another one pops its ugly head up to teach me another painful but enlightening lesson. I’m primarily an Introvert in my thinking and behavior, but since I’ve learned how to be more assertive, I’ve found I enjoy social activities much more. I’m no longer afraid I’ll get my boundaries stomped on or be made to do something I don’t want to do. It took a while, but here’s what I learned:
(1) Feeling at peace with myself is more important than getting people to like or accept me. Doing my “own thing” comes first in my life.
(2) Any problem with people always comes back to me. If someone tramples on my boundaries, then I’m the one that allowed it. If I say “yes” when I want to say “no” then that’s MY mistake.
(3) I’m a social animal even though I like lots of alone time–I’m not going to punish myself with loneliness just because I refuse to learn a few assertive/social skills.
(4) It’s never WHAT you say that offends people, it’s HOW you say it.
(5) There’s good and loving qualities in most all people…even the rude, insensitive ones. I choose to focus on the behaviors and traits I enjoy and ignore the others.

Assertiveness is a lifelong learning experience for me. As soon as I learn how to be “kindly” assertive in one type of situation, another one pops its ugly head up to teach me another painful but enlightening lesson.

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