The introvert in high school

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A 17 year old introvert wrote a wonderful message to me in the comment box a few days ago, and I really appreciate it! I often get great comments from awesome introverts, but you often don’t leave an email address where I could reply to you! I just want you to know that [...]

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Introvert friends: the perfect fit

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Like many of you, I have an oddly diverse assortment of friends. I’ve often felt bad about not ever doing “enough” with most of them, and in fact I think a couple of friends have dumped me over the years for that very reason. If I say yes to dinner, then they ask [...]

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How introverted do I want my life to be?

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Although some introverts don’t mind setting clear, firm boundaries with neighbors, coworkers, friends, and family, there are other introverts who seem to be magnets for people and seem to just take the overload until they get to a breaking point. I’m that way and I know a lot of you are. We’re the [...]

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Be selective about your activities, but do the important ones anyway

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Sometimes we’re accused of being snobs or disliking society in general. “OK, just be that way! You’re antisocial!” We’ve all heard that when we say no thanks to the fourth lunch invitation that week or to yet another party with coworkers. Of course there’s nothing wrong with us, any more than there’s something wrong with [...]

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I’d get a lot more haircuts if I could order ‘em from Amazon!

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I know I look a whole lot better with a haircut that’s just four to six weeks old. But from early October until December 31st, I did not get a cut and really didn’t look my best at work or during the holidays. I consciously trimmed down my obligations for December, because with [...]

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Eye contact wears this introvert out – faster than anything else!

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As I’ve started to try to analyze the kinds of activities that I do with others that exhaust me the fastest and what I do to catch a refreshing break, eye contact is the number one battery drainer for me. A regular party will wear me out much faster than a game-watching party, [...]

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Introvert needs are positive and healthy

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Funny, when we talk about holidays or social events or many other topics, we introverts agree on a lot of things that we definitely need. We need time to recharge, or process all the stimulation we’ve had, or whatever it is that happens that makes us feel good, like we’re supposed to again. [...]

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Introverts and neighbors

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Some of the TV shows I’ve enjoyed the most over the years have been set in a house or apartment with a steady stream of people coming and going. After all, it wouldn’t be any fun to watch a show where the character is reading or watching a movie alone for the whole half [...]

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Of course I don’t want to go, but an ask would be nice!

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Sometimes it’s easy to feel lonely just because of all the wild activity we see (and imagine) all around us. We hear about parties and other social gatherings to which we weren’t even invited, and of course we see evidence of such events all the time, even at the supermarket. People are [...]

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Introvert micro energy management

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Most of us introverts are conscious of how we have to be careful to allocate our days and people-energy to the people and things that we care about most in our lives. We want to spend time with loved ones and other friends. We need to give our very best to our job, [...]

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Thanks, but I have my own drummer

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Since childhood, I have never understood the people I uncharitably think of as “chameleons.” From the time we were teenagers, I’ve known two people who seemed to completely change themselves several times, based on who they were hanging out with. As teenagers, they started out in a relatively rough crowd in high [...]

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Quiet! Trying to think here!

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Although some introverts are calm, or appear calm almost all the time, I’m not that type. When I’m under pressure to think and get something important done, I’m calm and analytical, unless there are humans talking to me while I’m trying to think. Actually, I’d always thought I was the type to get [...]

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Holidays and the introvert

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If you’re an introvert who celebrates any of the late year holidays, then sometime around the beginning or middle of October you probably became aware of a nagging thought that it’s getting to be that time again. If you have family members to love, then your thoughts about the holidays are not all bah [...]

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Why is enjoying my favorite spots considered “hiding?”

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When you go to the beach and you see 100 feet of coastline jam packed with people so there’s not even space to walk between the towels, but just beyond that crowded area there are just a few people but lots of space between them, which area would you head for? I for [...]

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Introvert Extrovert: Reaching out across the abyss

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Of course it’s not really an abyss. But sometimes we need to stop to think how things look from the other side of the fence. A couple of weeks ago Mark commented on the post Don’t ask an introvert if he’s OK!, and since that post was one of [...]

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How to kill interruptions and prevent new ones from hatching

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Unless we seriously have nothing to do, introverts hate interruptions when they’re trying to work. Interruptions not only temporarily take us away from the task we’re trying to complete, they destroy our concentration and may set us back hours trying to get back to where we left off. Some interruptions are important, such as when [...]

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Four times it would be great if introverts had extra batteries

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As I’ve told you, I truly love being an introvert. I can’t describe to extroverts the elation I feel when I know I have a good long stretch of time where I can read, write, or do whatever I want. But of course I live in the real world where every day [...]

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Introvert: Hold a moment while I’m processing…

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I saw this bumper sticker on Zazzle a few weeks ago, and it caught my eye because it mentions one of our traits that many people don’t know about.    Many of us take a bit longer to think before we speak than extroverts do.   Oh we can come up with words just fine when [...]

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Introvert does not equal doormat!

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In the past few days, a reader named Bella has left comments on the post about how asking an introvert for an outrageous favor may make us hate someone, or of course a more accurate way of saying it would have been that we’d avoid someone. In Bella’s case, it is her own sister [...]

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An introvert in college – how to survive and even thrive!

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A lot of introverts are looking for help in dealing with being an introvert in college.  Why are introverted students the ones who have to be concerned or sometimes miserable?  After all, introversion is a normal personality preference; it’s not a disability or disease.  However, since we are the minority and many people do not [...]

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